itsallaframingdevice.jpg or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Stuff (~2016 Year In Review~)

EXT. DUSK. JUST OUTSIDE SUBWAY PLATFORM.

He looks around as the light falls and the wind snaps at his jacket. He’s fumbling with his headphones, but his mittened fingers are not doing what he wants. He could take his mittens off, but that’s, like, a lot of work. And it’s cold. He starts walking towards his uncertain destination (hint: it rhymes with  fhis fhapartment). When he’s half way across the street, he hears someone call his name.

“Oh, perfect timing,” he mutters to himself. He turns around, glaring at the voice. He sees Brynna, his friend from college. “Oh shit. What’s up, Bryn? What’re you doing around here?” he says to her as she hustles up and hugs him. “You came from Harlem for that? I guess, you do you. What are you doing now?”

…

“That’s cool. I got nothing doing. Wanna grab a drink?”

They hurry to a bar close by. It’s quiet and the lights are low. Pockets of people are spread intermittently. Everyone just looks like the cold outside, noses bright red, shoulders scrunched close to their necks. They find a booth towards the back that doesn’t have anyone in it, so they invite themselves in. He goes up to get them a round, and she takes out her phone and checks it. After a brief wait, he returns with a Stella for her, a whiskey coke for him. They take a sip, sit back in their seats, and settle in.

“So everything really is good? How’s Jake? How’s your mom and Katie and Mark? They’re good, too?”

He listens as she answers.

He listens as she answers.

He listens as she answers.

Yes, the point is, it’s a lengthy answer. They haven’t seen each other in a while. It’s a lot of catching up to do. You’ll survive.

“I’m glad to hear it’s mostly positive, boo. There’s still some positives in this terrible year.”

…

“Agreed, fuck 2016 the most.”

…

“I’m doing alright, ya know. Been better. Definitely been worse. But definitely been better.”

…

“Uh, yeah, tbh, (he says tbh out loud, because he can be insufferable in his irony), but yeah, tbh I don’t think I’m as good as I thought I was?” He frames it almost as a question. “Like, I’m definitely still in a much better place than I was- yeah exactly, junior year, exactly, I’m better than that. But I think I was better a couple months ago. Which, it isn’t a terrible thing anymore. I’m no longer devastated by acknowledging that. But ya know, it’s not ideal. Cracks in the facade is how I’ve been putting it. I can see the cracks. But they no longer make up most of the facade, so I’ve been trying to look at the positives.”

…

“Yeah, I’ve been going back to therapy. It’s been helping. I stopped going for a couple months because the new job, and just the schedule didn’t work. But I’m gonna try and make an appointment soon to stop it snowballing.”

…

“It’s just random moods again. It pops up differently now. It’s evolving. I just have been getting anxious more. That part left for a while, but it’s slowly creeping it’s way back. And lately, I’ve been getting angry randomly. For no reason. I don’t get angry really, so it’s weird. Or I didn’t. In some ways it’s good because my default emotion isn’t sadness anymore, I can actually feel other stuff. But I don’t want to get angry for no reason, ya know?”

…

“It’s actually really awesome, yeah. I’m really enjoying it.  I’m mostly collecting clips for the show, which means watching a lot of hockey and finding it in the archive and stuff. It’s really great, it’s what I want to do. My boss is really cool, too, so that’s a good bonus. And I’ve done other stuff too, like I worked one of the game broadcasts for the Rangers, which was awesome. More stereotypical PA duties, like getting people coffee and making copies and stuff, but still, really really cool.”

…

“Thanks, Bryn. Yeah, it really was just a perfect opportunity. And worst case scenario, even if it doesn’t turn into a long term thing, it’s still really good experience, and I feel like there’s a contact somewhere that can lead me into something. And on top of that, it’s just really fucking cool to work there. I met Sam Rosen. I hang out with Ron Duguay. Steve Valiquette knows my name. And these are people that I am used to watching on tv. It’s just a really good time.”

…

“Nah, no ladies right now. Been on a couple dates and stuff, but it just hasn’t worked out.”

…

“I know, I know it will. It’s hard at times to see that forest through the trees, but I know it will. And those old creeping feelings come back sometimes. But I know.”

…

That’s really shitty of them, they shouldn’t do that.”

…

She gets up to get them another round, and returns.

“Shit. Craig Sager died.”

…

“I know. I got into basketball a little too late to have a full appreciation for him, but it’s still hard. I don’t know why it is, but just, whenever someone famous dies, it just makes me want to let the people I care about know that I love them. It’s a totally selfish reaction, but that’s all I can think about, is telling my mom I love her.”

…

“So many. David Bowie.”

…

“Alan Rickman.”

…

“Gene Wilder, dude.”

…

“It’s a garbage year for sure. There were some positives I guess. I watched Always Sunny for the first time. I found a website that has a 24 hour livestream of puppies playing with each other. I moved to a dope ass new apartment. I still have my health for the most part. But yeah, a lot of it sucked. Without even getting into the storm cloud of Trump and Mike Pence and Mitch McConnell and Paul Ryan.”

…

“They choose political party over country, and then have the audacity to call Edward Snowden a traitor.”

…

“I know. This is two white people having this discussion. We can be worried and shit, but like, we aren’t wearing a hijbab. We won’t be deported just because we might be Mexican. I don’t even a uterus to worry about. I hate pretty much everything that they stand for, but the sad fact is, I won’t really be in that much danger.”

…

“See, I disagree. I don’t think we should give him a chance or compromise or whatever. Because compromise makes his thoughts and policies legitimate, and they’re not. They’re just not. He’s gaslighting America. Yes, I’m using the Teen Vogue article. It’s true. He’s making us question what is actually real and sane. Coming closer to his beliefs and compromising doesn’t actually benefit anyone, because his beliefs are so far removed from anything that it’s bullshit. I won’t compromise on some shit, and I won’t move my opinion to the middle for it. Yes, I’m that annoying liberal who everyone hates. Yes, I got called a cuck the other day for calling the Alt-Right Neo-Nazis. I’ve been steadying calling them Alt-Reich more and more because Richard Spencer is fucking scum and a Neo-Nazi.”

…

“Nixon got impeached for less than Trump did during the last debate. He is so far beyond anything that the Presidential office has seen before, and we all are just pretending it’s the same as it’s always been. I looked up what Mitt Romney got in trouble for in 2012, his binders full of women comment. He got asked a question about women appointees to his team, and he said he was binders full of women candidates. That’s it! That’s all he said! Trump says worse shit on the daily! Trump made fun of a disabled reporter. Like, there are just so many examples. He’s going with the Seattle Seahawks theory of pass interference. The Seahawks grab and hold on pretty much every play, thinking, correctly, that the refs can’t call it every single play. That’s what Trump is doing with crazy shit. He’s saying so much we just can’t comprehend it.”

…

“I guess, but even that I don’t really see. I do want to be an advocate, but a paperclip doesn’t do much.”

…

“It is better than nothing, but like, respectfully, I haven’t done nothing. I’ve donated twice to Planned Parenthood, I’ve donated to the ACLU, I’m volunteering. I think, and it’s my opinion totally, that that makes more of an impact. But that’s just me. I don’t want to tell people how to advocate.”

…

“You’re right. It’s not my place. I can think whatever, but again, ultimately, I’m not the one who is the most affected.”

…

“Yeah. Have you heard that hour mix of all of Quavo’s guest tracks? It’s pretty sweet.”

…

“Yeah, no problem, I’ll walk you to the subway.”

…

“No, seriously, I’m going that way anyway.”

…

“Yes, I know my apartment is the other way, but whatever.”

They venture into the cold. She thanks him for his chivalry, but it’s not chivalry. He just has to go grocery shopping, and he likes the store that is this way.

They part ways.

He walks to the store in the cold, hoping the cute young woman who works the checkout counter is there.

I guess he should abandon this framing device now that Brynna’s gone, huh? I know, Shyamalan twist there. I was he the whole time. Crazy, right. I haven’t wrote in a while. And needed a way to introduce it and to let the topic vary. I’m not good at saying on topic. I don’t know who’s reading this. But if you are, thanks. It helped me vent. And it’s cheaper than therapy. I would know, I’m paying for that too. Anyway. Yeah. Bye. Yeah. Yeah. Bye. Yeah. Uh huh. Nah. Yeah. Nah. Really, I gotta go. Yeah. Yeah. Bye. Yeah. Bye. Seriously, I gotta go. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I love you too. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Bye.

 

College Reunion

Thomas Worden, he of the Iona College Skits O’Frenicks and Iona College Theatre Ensemble, has so far been successful post college. He started off at a small studio in New York City, working production for a late night TV show that most of you probably haven’t seen. In his part time, he directed a self written musical entitled, “Shot Through The Heart.” It drew rave but confused reviews, like, “I thought it was good, but like, what the hell?” from Broadway Today and, “It was wonderful, but I still don’t understand any of it.” from Off Broadway Weekly. After the run ended, Thomas moved to Atlanta to work for FX Networks. He wrote and directed his own TV show, entitled “Whiskey: the life and death of Ernest Hemingway, zombie and lady killer.” The show in now in it’s 3rd season. Thomas isn’t married, but he’s still not gay.

Final Personnel Project Planning

The topic that I will explore is the death of the film noir. I plan on making a film noir type video for the final project, and so I will research what exactly happened to the film noir. It was a hugely popular and successful type of movie, especially during the 1940s to 1950s. While some movies incorporate aspects of film noirs or melodramas, rarely are these types of movies made anymore.

 

The company that I will follow is FX Networks, an offshoot of Fox. FX has their own creative programming, with many critically acclaimed shows in their lineup, including a record setting 45 Emmy nominations last year. They have recently unveiled a spin off network, FXX, which is their version of a comedy network. In this spin off, they have long-standing show It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia, as well as other original programming.

 

The blog that I will follow is The AV Club (found at avclub.com). They post daily content on a wide variety of mass media, from TV show reviews to movie reviews to music to comedy specials. They also do analysis of all these different things. Their daily content is important to me, as is the variety of things that they post about.

The books that I will read are “Live From New York: An Uncensored History of Saturday Night Live, as Told By Its Stars, Writers and Guests” and “The Wire: Truth Be Told.” These are two books about two outstanding television series. SNL is one of the longest running programs ever, with so many huge stars having passed through there. The Wire is one of the most critically acclaimed shows ever. An in depth look at these two shows will further my knowledge of television.

My Personal Profile

My personal profile as it relates to mass communication is varied and vast. I enjoy consuming media, through TV and movies and video games and podcasts. I enjoy making media, through short videos with my friends. That leads me into my career goals. I would like to write and produce my own TV show. I am a funny person, with an offbeat sense of humor that would bring people in. I write in different forms, just to practice and improve. I write stand up comedy, and have performed at a few different places. I wrote my own play, and hope to perform it this semester. I wrote a TV pilot, and hope to continue with it. I write shorts already. That is my career goal, and something I hope to accomplish.

Man, Kentucky is Scary

Just look at Kentucky’s stats. Look here and here. Look upon my works, ye mighty, and despair. I don’t even really know where to begin. Let’s start before the season. Coach John Calipari said that he would be utilizing a platoon system, which makes sense, when you consider the fact that Kentucky has 9 McDonald’s All-Americans on their roster. He swaps them like hockey lines, leaving players fresh and focused when they step on the court. 10 players have played more than 100 minutes, and no one has played more than 154. They’re deeeeeep.

Oh, jeez, the defense. Oh…oh man. Opponents have a True Shooting Percentage of 37%. They have an Offensive Rating of 67. They lead College Basketball by a mile in both statistics. No one else has held opponents to a True Shooting Percentage starting with a 3. Opponents have 39 assists against Kentucky. Total. In 7 games. Andrew Harrison and Tyler Ulis have more assists, combined. They lead the entire country in blocks with 65. They lead the 4th place team by 15 blocks, which is more than 56 schools have. Total. Yeesh.

The scariest part? The offensive really isn’t even that good yet. They’re only shooting 32% from 3. They are shooting 65% on free throws. They’re 114th in the country in turnovers, at 11 a game. They still have a ton of room to grow, which is poop in your pants terrifying. They destroyed Kansas by 32. Kansas only scored 40 points. Holy shit.

Ray Rice

Ray Rice was, and I suppose still technically is, a professional football player. He was very highly regarded in the community until this year, when video emerged of Rice carrying his unconscious wife out of an elevator. It was speculated, and all but guaranteed from context clues and body language, that Rice had knocked her out. There was immediate outrage from the public, and Rice was initially suspended for a total of 2 games. For context, the second time you are caught smoking weed by the NFL, who has a lower threshold for a positive test than the US Army, gets you suspended for 4 games. There was more public outcry, as many deemed the punishment unfitting of the crime. Domestic abuse cases had never been regulated before, and many had been settled without suspension from the league. Multiple reporters that cover the NFL said that Roger Goodell, the commissioner of the NFL, had seen the full video tape from that night, which is where many people took issue with the punishment. Months later, the full video emerged to the public, and people were livid. There was graphic footage of Rice striking his then-fiancee, her falling unconscious, and Rice, seemingly uncaring, carrying her body out of the elevator. The Ravens, the team that had employed by him and stood by him before, released him. The NFL suspended him indefinitely. This suspension was very polarizing, and recently deemed not legal, because the NFL was basically trying him for the same crime more than once. Various reports came out that Goodell had not seen the video previously, so either he was lying previously and was incompetent, or he had seen the video, and only deemed a 2 game suspension sufficient. Either way, he was grossly inadequate in his job. There were other cases, that of Greg Hardy and Adrian Peterson notably, that further muddled the waters. Hardy was charged with domestic abuse, and Peterson was charged with child abuse, a felony that was ultimately pled down to a misdemeanor, but both have been suspended for more weeks than Ray Rice were initially. They were charged before a new domestic abuse policy was put in place, they were charged with less than Rice was, but both have been punished more. There were also reports that the Ravens owner, Steve Bisciotti, convinced Goodell to be more lenient on Rice than he otherwise would’ve been. The public has seemingly changed opinions, and almost feel bad for Rice. There are few things more damning than the public deeming Rice and Peterson, who hit his child with a switch until his son had welts, victims in the whole affair.

St. Louis Rams and Holy Crap IS THIS REALLY A THING

St. Louis Rams players expressing their opinion

The events that have taken place in Ferguson, Missouri have shaken the country, and lead to what I consider healthy discussion about the state of race and class relations in America. Whatever your opinions on it, one thing that should universally be agreed on is people’s right to share their opinions on. The First Amendment is oftentimes used to defend people’s blatant wrongness, but the point is still there: in this country, we have freedom of speech. I don’t necessarily have to respect your opinion, but I do need to respect your right to an opinion. This became an issue this past weekend.

The St. Louis Rams had 5 players,Tavon Austin, Stedman Bailey, Jared Cook, ChrisGivens, and Kenny Britt, walk out during introductions and do the popular “Hands Up, Don’t Shoot” gesture, in solidarity with the protesters in Ferguson, and all over the world. A good amount of people have commended them for their willingness to stand up on a social issue, and to show unity to a community shaken by grief and loss. However, a very vocal minority of people, including the St. Louis Police Officers Association, blasted them for having the tenacity to exercise their right to free speech. In their statement, business manager Jeff Roorda called the action, “tasteless, offensive, and inflammatory,” and also said, “The SLPOA is calling for the players involved to be disciplined and for the Rams and the NFL to deliver a very public apology.” Roorda brought up sponsors, and how they might look negatively at this.

You might be thinking, “what the shit? Athletes speaking out is a good thing. They are constantly in the public light, so them taking a positive stance on a social issue is a good thing.” And to that I say, yeah, duh.

Los Angeles Lakers, and When Schadenfreude Turns To Pity

Aw. The Lakers. Aw. Come on guys, stop making fun of them. I know it’s easy when these tools exist, and this tool exists, and this tool exists. But now, it’s just sad.

It’s always fun to hate the Lakers. Everyone hates the Lakers. Their fans are the worst of ever, they’ve always been great, and they somehow luck their way into EVERYTHING. Oh, sure, trade an All Star Center in Vlade Divac for an unproven high schooler named Kobe Bryant. Oh, sure, trade Don Ford, he of the mighty averages of 6 points, 4 rebounds, and 1 assist per game, for a future first round pick, and have it turn into the Number 1 pick, who turns into a Hall Of Famer in James Worthy. Everything just works out for them. They even traded for Steve Nash, a future Hall Of Famer, and Dwight Howard, the best center in the game. That’s when everything went to shit.

Nash got hurt, Howard got hurt, Kobe got hurt, Mike Brown was run out of town, Mike D’Antoni was run out of town, Kobe got hurt again, and the pre-season Finals pick lost in the first round. Now though? Now it’s just sad.

The Lakers actually played free agency smart, not overspending on B-level players and tying up cap space. But this means that the Lakers are stuck playing replacement level players, like Ronnie Price and Robert Sacre and Jordan Clarkson. They’re not just bad, they’re historically awful. Every player has negative defensive win shares. Every. Single. Player. That’s almost impressive. They are 30th in Defensive Rating, 1.5 points worse than any other team. Their opponents Effective Field Goal Percentage is 54%, which is 29th in the league.

Their coach, Byron Scott, also wants the Lakers to play like it’s 1975 and analytics haven’t been invented yet. It’s common knowledge that 3’s are the most efficient shot in the league, especially corner 3’s, and that midrange-to-long 2’s are the least efficient. The Lakers are leading the league in % of field goals from 10-16 feet, and are second in % of field goals from 16 feet to 23 feet, and are shooting 37% and 43% on those shots, respectively. Yikes

There are only two saving graces on this team, and even those come with caveats. Kobe Bryant is leading the league in scoring, but he is shooting 39%. He has missed more shots all but 20 people have attempted. So grain of salt that shit. The other good thing is that, if the Lakers are awful enough, they keep their first round pick this year. It is top 5 protected, however, and they are currently 5th worst record-wise. If lottery balls don’t roll their way, then this lost season was for nothing. (Also, Julius Randle, the team’s lottery pick this year, broke his leg in the first game of the season, because womp.)

So, yeah, try and take it easy on the Lakers. Who knows when they’ll be hateable again.

 

 

Anthony Davis and Potential

Anthony Davis was the best prospect to come out of college since LeBron James, and so far, holy crap has he been all that and more. He is a terrifying combination of length, athleticism, skill, and youth.  I mean, look at this. And this. There’s 1 guy who can make plays like that, and he plays in Smoothie King Center. So far this season in 16 games, he has averaged 25 points a game, 11 rebounds, 2 assists, 2.3 steals, and 3.1 blocks per game. Add that up and it totals a PER (Player Efficiency Rating) of 33.3. The league average is 15 flat. He is doubling that with room to spare. Holy crap is right. The only other player to have comparable stats (PER above 25 and blocks above 1.5 were my parameters) at 21? Shaquille O’Neal, a surefire First Ballot Hall Of Famer and a force of nature. The only players to have a PER above 30 and block at least 3 shots a game, at any age? David Robinson and Shaq again. They were 28 and 27, respectively, and in their primes. Davis is doing this at an age when most people are figuring out their post-college plans. Davis’s most recent game was insane, and pretty much unprecedented. He threw up 25 points, 10 rebounds, 4 assists, 6 steals, and 5 blocks. The only other person to have those stats is Hakeem Olajuwon, and he needed double overtime to do so. Holy crap is all I can manage to say. The scary thing about Davis? You can see how raw and unpolished he still is. He still has so much room to grow, and that should be absolutely terrifying for the NBA.

Redsk*ns

Hey, dicknuts, change the f*cking name.

It’s racist, demeaning, and shitty. Just…just change it. How hard is that.